Boxes. Containers. Glasses. Small, medium, and large. We need these things. We put our “stuff” inside of them. We all need them, yet sometimes they can hinder us more than they can help. I was watching the show Little Big Shots, and one of the groups on there were contortionists. A little girl from the group had actually folded herself into a small box. I’m not flexible really. And the thought of just putting myself into a box on purpose sounds horrifying. Yet, she did it for fun! Putting things inside of boxes is useful. However, when we try to put the Almighty in a box, we are sinning, and we are forgetting that God is who He says He is.
1 – Putting my own life into that figurative “Box”
All too often I find myself trying to put my crazy life into a box. I try to confine my life to how I think it should be going. Yet, that is not helpful at all. I am not in control of my life. Never have been. Never will be.
Since my last update, I was doing actually pretty great! I had gotten an infusion right before Christmas, and I was starting to feel pretty great. However, that seemed to be short lived. I ended up getting the flu.
I had never had the flu. And let me just tell you that it stinks! I felt awful and had a fever of 104.6 at one time. Fortunately, I was supposed to see my doctor the same week so, I just thought that I could make it until Thursday. (There I go again, thinking that I can do something.) Thankfully, my mom contacted the doctor and he got me an appointment on Wednesday to make sure I wasn’t getting pneumonia.
Thankfully, no pneumonia!!! But I did have the flu. Side note: the flu test where they shove the swab into your brain. . .hurts extremely bad. Thankfully, the x-rays didn’t show pneumonia, but I did have the flu. YUCK!
Hospital Stay #???
Well, I had to be admitted to the hospital. . .again. This time just because my blood pressure was pretty low and heart rate was high, and the doctors were concerned about sending me home until this was stable. I only stayed one night and was given fluids. Thankfully, I was able to go home after my short stay.
Now, the last few weeks have been interesting. I guess the flu really takes a lot out of someone and especially if your immune system is practically non-existent. The next few weeks have been pretty much consistent with work, school, baseball, and church.
2 – Putting God in that figurative “box”
I would have to say that this is something that we all do whether we realize it or not. When I say putting God in a “box,” this can mean a lot of things. For me, I didn’t even realize it was happening. I have had several specific things on my heart that I wanted God to answer. God is always answering my prayers in the way that is best and that will bring Him the most glory.
Yet, when He doesn’t answer the way I think he should, this is when I begin putting Him in that figurative “box.” I think of John 11 when I think of God not answering prayers. Martha gets so upset with Jesus for not coming and answering her prayer that Lazarus would not die. However, it is so incredible to see that God’s purpose for Lazarus’ death was that He would be glorified. Jesus is able to give Martha the Gospel and let her respond. What God had in store was greater than anything Martha could have even imagined.
“If God is who He says He is, the Ultimate & Almighty, we can trust that His infinite wisdom is MORE than that of our finite minds.”
She tried to confine God to her box and make Him do what she thought would be best. I heard a Christian blogger, Jordan Lee, say that “If God is who He says He is, the Ultimate & Almighty, we can trust that His infinite wisdom is MORE that that of our finite minds.” Sometimes God answers exactly what we pray. Sometimes, His answer is more than we can ever dream. And sometimes, His answer is not at all what we wanted. But His answer is always good!
God answered two of my prayers: one exactly and one way more than I ever though possible. I am still slightly speechless to see how great my God is!
In Isaiah 42:16, It states that ” I will lead the blind by a way they did not know; I will guide them on paths they have not known. I will turn darkness to light in front of them and rough places into level ground. This is what I will do for them, and I will not abandon them.” This verse has been such an encouragement to me the past few weeks. If you get a chance, read Isaiah 42:10-16. I find this to be encouraging on the dark days of dealing with a chronic illness.
Some days, I feel like I am stumbling in the dark trying to figure out what I did today that triggered my inflammation to go haywire. Sometimes, these days are the hardest to understand as an outsider. Yet, I know that He will do these things for me. He will never abandon me.
Health-wise, I am feeling pretty good these days. I am going to see my doctor on April 27th. I am so thankful for this doctor. It has been just over a year since I met him, and I am thankful for the way he has helped me in different areas. Spring is here and creation is beautiful! Go outside. Enjoy the warmer weather. Until next time . . .